Highlights

  • Jennette McCurdy quit acting to pursue writing and editing, leading to the success of her memoir, 'I'm Glad My Mom Died,' which sold over two million copies.
  • Jennette had a strained relationship with her father, Mark McCurdy, due to the complicated dynamics within their family.
  • Jennette discovered that Mark was not her biological dad, and after an initial attempt to revive their relationship, she ultimately let it dissolve. She then found her biological father but their bond also disintegrated over time.

Jennette McCurdy’s life has taken a few dramatic turns since her time on the hit Nickelodeon sitcom, iCarly, lapsed. For one, McCurdy is no longer chasing auditions in Hollywood, having quit acting in 2017 to pursue a career in writing and editing instead.

The drastic career change seems to have worked out perfectly, with her provocatively titled memoir, 'I'm Glad My Mom Died,' in which she boldly delves into her profoundly dysfunctional relationship with her now-deceased mom, Debra McCurdy, selling over two million copies as of February 2023.

McCurdy has also had to confront some harrowing realities in her personal life, one of which was discovering that the man she had always believed to be her father, Mark McCurdy, was not, in fact, her biological parent. So, did the Sam & Cat star ultimately manage to reconnect with her biological father?

Did Jennette McCurdy Have A Good Relationship With Her Dad, Mark McCurdy?

Jennette McCurdy was seemingly living a charmed life back when iCarly was still one of the most-watched sitcoms on Nickelodeon. However, as fans would later find out, the glitzy exterior concealed some harrowing personal struggles.

At just 11, McCurdy was already battling severe emotional issues brought about by her deeply dysfunctional relationship with her mom, Debra. “There was this half of my life that was so cheesy and so polished and so glossy and so fake,” she shared with The Washington Post in August 2022.

“And then there was this other part of my life that was so painful and real and raw and hurting, and that part was going completely unseen.”

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The now 31-year-old's struggles went almost completely unnoticed by her father, Mark McCurdy, with whom she appears to have had a pretty strained relationship. Speaking to BuzzFeed in August 2022, Jennette delved into the complicated family dynamics that might’ve played a part in Mark deciding to turn a blind eye to her mom’s abusive tendencies.

“I get how complicated [my father’s] role in that family was,” she explained to BuzzFeed. “My mom had this long affair, had these three other children that weren’t his, and I imagine the timing of her cancer played a factor in his sticking around. But, as much as I try to see it from the point of view of the various adults that were in the household, I just don’t have much respect for their approach.”

How Did Jennette McCurdy Discover That Mark McCurdy Wasn’t Her Biological Dad?

After losing her mom to a long-fought battle with cancer, McCurdy had to confront some shocking realities about her family, one of which was discovering that Mark McCurdy wasn’t her biological dad.

The shocking revelation, which surfaced during a poignant conversation with Mark, left Jennette feeling utterly adrift. “I remember feeling like I got the wind knocked out of me. My mouth was really dry,” she recalled of the conversation in her 2022 interview with Drew Barrymore. “I felt that he’d always been pretty disengaged and disconnected. So, it was shocking, but I also started to find excuses for him in that information. Oh, that’s why he was so absent all those years."

Motivated almost entirely by guilt, Jennette attempted to revive her already strained relationship with Mark McCurdy.

“Initially, I felt a lot of guilt, and tried to really work on that relationship, and see him and his then I guess maybe she became his wife shortly after that. I tried to see them quite often, and then it just didn’t feel right in my bones,” she shared with Drew Barrymore. “I just felt like… there’s no real connection here, it just doesn’t feel right in my bones.”

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Ultimately, even Jennette's guilt wasn't enough to maintain the strained connection with Mark. “That was a relationship that I kind of let dissolve, let disintegrate,” she revealed to Drew Barrymore. “There wasn’t really much there to begin with.”

Did Jennette McCurdy Ever Find Her Biological Dad?

In the aftermath of the poignant conversation with Mark McCurdy, Jennette found herself embarking on a quest to find her biological father. Accompanied by her friend Colton and fellow iCarly luminary Miranda Cosgrove, Jennette set a course for a hotel in Newport Beach, where the man her mom had maintained an affair with for most of her marriage to Mark McCurdy was scheduled to perform.

At the hotel, McCurdy finally came face to face with her biological dad. “I ask him if he knew about me, that I existed. He says yes. And my brothers,” she recalls in her memoir. “He says that he’s been waiting for us to contact him. He didn’t want to contact us because he wasn’t sure if we knew. He asks how I found out. I tell him. He says things ended poorly with Mom and that there was a big custody battle when we were little—that Mom said he was physically abusive (he assures me he wasn’t). She won.”

Though brief, the encounter ignited hope that Jennette might finally have the chance to build the happy family she’d craved for so long.

“My brothers, I have three older brothers, two of them are biological brothers, and they hadn’t met him, and I was sort of doing the thing of trying to get them to meet him,” she shared with Drew Barrymore, “and thinking like this could be good, this could be healing for all of us.”

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For a time, it seemed quite likely that her newly discovered biological dad would fill the void left by the ever-aloof Mark McCurdy.

The two remained in close contact for several months after their first meeting, seeing each other “once a week” for “maybe three to four months,” before their bond ultimately disintegrated. “It got to a place where that one felt a little strange also,” Jennette explained to Barrymore.

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